This article contains spoilers forI’m Thinking Of Ending Things.
Upon first viewing ofI’m Thinking Of Ending Things, viewers may have been confused about what it all meant and find themselves asking “What did I just watch?” At times, the movie can feel a little unorganized and cause more frustration than enjoyment for first-time viewers. If given a second chance,I’m Thinking Of Ending Thingswill start to make more sense and may be the source of an existential crisis for weeks to come.
The opening images in Charlie Kaufman’s new film are of old, repeated pattern wallpaper designs in an old house with a voice-over of a young woman discussing a recurring thought she has been having. She says, “I’m thinking of ending things” and goes on to say how this thought has been consuming her. She is unsure of when the thought began, but it feels “old and unoriginal” as if this thought and the actions to follow were meant to be and were always going to happen. This is the theme of the film—time, old age, regret, and the inability to turn from one’s path in life leading to melancholy thoughts of where the path will end. The wallpaper is a metaphor for the daily events in a person’s life and how they are often dull, routine, and unchanging.
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On the surface level, this movie is about a woman wanting to end her relationship with her new boyfriend, Jake. The first time the viewer sees the young woman, she is bright and colorful, smiling and happy. She is going on a road trip to meet Jake’s parents. As she waves to Jake—who is picking her up in his car—she notices someone watching her. This is old Jake looking back at a moment in his life that slipped away, and this shows that all of the events in the movie are happening in Jake’s mind.
By the end of the film, it is discovered that the woman does not exist, and that this is a story about an old man thinking about suicide. Old Jake can be seen intercut throughout the rest of the film. Along the rest of the car ride to Jake’s parents' house, the young woman’s appearance changes from bright to dull. Her smile fades and she becomes very cynical. She begins to display signs of aging when she puts on her reading glasses to be able to see her phone. This is another metaphor for how youth is optimistic and hopeful,but as one gets older, reality sets in.
As the woman is thinking of ending things, it becomes clear that Jake can read or hear her thoughts. This is because the young woman is just a projection of Jake’s thoughts. Some might say she represents his idealized woman, based on the movies, songs, and other media he consumes. This is further represented by her changing name and appearance.
Another possibility as to what the woman represents is actually just Jake’s conscious mind. He created the woman to help understand what his mind was thinking. Once they arrive at Jake’s parents' house, the woman sees scratches on the door to the basement. Jake seems to be terrified of letting the woman go into the basement. It is obvious that the basement represents Jake’s subconscious mind.Jake is afraid of his conscious mind(the woman) becoming aware of his subconscious thoughts because once she does, it will surely mean death for him. His decision will be made and he will go through with his suicide.
Not only does the woman’s appearance change throughout the movie, but so does her occupation. She is a painter, a physicist, a poet, and a dancer. This can be interpreted as all of the dreams Jake had about what his life would be like and what career he would have. At the dinner table with Jake’s parents, the woman shows the mom and dad pictures of her paintings. The mom tells her that Jake is also a skilled painter. When the woman later goes into the basement, she discovers old paintings covered in dust. Paintings that look just like the ones she supposedly did. These paintings were actually made by the famous American painter, Ralph Albert Blakelock.
Later when the woman goes into Jake’s childhood bedroom, she seesa book opened to a poemthat she recited earlier to Jake as if it was her own. She is becoming aware that her memories and the details in her life are not her own. This supports the idea that the woman represents Jake’s failed desires in life. It also shows how media has greatly influence Jake’s expectations of life. He had dreams of becoming great, but in reality, he is just a sad janitor (shown by the janitor’s uniforms in the washing machine in the basement).
Throughout the film, the woman is heard saying that she needs to go home. But the poem that she recited earlier talks about how going home is miserable, sad, and lonely. This shows that Jake’s mind still isn’t made up. Jake’s parents can be seen getting older (and younger) from scene to scene. Jake is remembering them as they are and as they were. But when his mother dies, he decides that it is time to leave.
Jake and the young woman get back on the road, and the woman is still heard saying that she wants to go home, but Jake stops to get ice cream, possibly representing a found memory of gettingice cream as a young child, or possibly stalling for what is to come next. A young girl at the ice cream stand tells the woman that she doesn’t need to keep going forward with this decision, the decision being suicide. But Jake is already on this path and cannot turn from it. So they continue further to the final scene in the school where Jake works. Along the way, their ice cream melts. Too fast it seems. This is a visual metaphor for how fast youth disappears.
When they reach the school, Jake looks for a place to throw away the melted ice cream. There is a trash bin full of the same ice cream showing that Jake has been here many times before with this thought. The woman begs Jake to not go into the school, one last attempt at stopping Jake. He goes in anyway. The hallways of the school can be represented as the twisting and turning thoughts one has. And Jake takes one last trip down memory lane. He thinks back to how he got where he is—a lonely janitor.
In a surreal dance number, it is shown how Jake believes the path to nowhere that he is on is what killed his youth and hope. Young Jake is no longer, replaced by the very real and very present old Jake. He goes out to his car and intentionally sets his keys on the passenger seat. He has given up. As hypothermia sets in,Jake begins hallucinating. His memories bending and tangling into a disorientating jumble as he freezes to death.
There is a lot to dissect inI’m Thinking Of Ending Things. Every view and every viewer will interpret this movie differently. But one thing is for certain, this is not a happy or hopeful story. The sad truth is that Jake’s disappointments and unmet expectations of life are a reality for many people. This story warns viewers of the dangerous effects film, TV, art, music and more can have on people. Despite what the movie says, it is never too late to turn from any path and make life better.
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